SPOILER!!! If you haven’t watched the movie, there may be some spoilers and you may want to read this later after you watch the film for yourself or if you have no desire to see the movie, read on.
I personally enjoyed this movie. It wasn’t a knock your socks off thriller, but it entertained my family and I from beginning to end. This movie is about a woman named Cecilia, played by Elisabeth Moss. You find out from the very start that she is trying to escape this fortress/Toni Stark looking home where her controlling, abusive, rich, scientist husband lords over her. Can I ask this question real quick? Why every time someone tries to escape an abusive situation, they leave at night? Could she not leave while he was away at work? Or he was taking a massive dump? I mean seriously though!
Anyway, she successfully escapes and is on pins and needles wondering if he will eventually find her. She later finds out that he committed suicide and is relieved that she can finally live her life. However, although she was told he was deceased, she has a sneaking suspicion that she could still feel his presence around her. Things in her material reality start to align with those assumptions, but she can’t prove it. Oh, and there is that little detail that he told her that he would stalk her and she wouldn’t be able to see him! Now let’s get to the motivational themes I picked up during the film shall we.
In the movie, Cecilia was controlled by her super intelligent, mega rich, scientist anal husband, so she plotted a plan of escape. Although it may not be an actual person like in the movie, we often allow people or situations to control us, sometimes without even being aware of it. We are constantly giving away our power and then wondering why we feel so restricted. I know for a fact there are some areas of my life that I still give up my power, but I’m actively identifying those areas and planning my escape route. It can be scary to change something that has its grip on you. Sometimes, there is almost a comfort in the control, but remember this quote:
Everything you want is on the other side of fearGeorge Addaie
There was a job that I felt was a literal, gargantuan leech that sucked the life out of me and the only way to recharge was to go straight home, interact with my family as little as possible, and go straight to bed. I realized that the job was controlling my overall happiness and although I was terrified of letting my colleagues down, it was time for me to plot my escape plan. That plan was successful and now I work a job that gives me balance.
To identify areas you may be restricted, please consider keeping a journal. When you write down how you feel on a daily basis, you can keep track of your overall contentment. For example if you’re writing down for 30 days straight complaining about the same person each day, you should consider not spending time with that person. It sounds like that example could be something you can realize without journal-ing, but sometimes we don’t pick up on the patterns, especially if we have been taught to remain in toxic relationships and/or situations.
Oh, You Crazy Huh?
Another part of the movie that struck me was the fact that no one believed that her husband figured out how to become invisible and was stalking her. Oftentimes in our own lives we have things or situations that bother us and people will tell us it’s no big deal or it’s all in our heads. The biggest lesson I have learned recently is to TRUST MYSELF!! Nobody knows YOU better than YOU know yourself.
I can be very indecisive at times, but I learned that it wasn’t because I didn’t know what was best, it was because I sought out the opinions of too many people around me when I already intuitively knew which route to take. Sometimes, what is uncomfortable for you is totally acceptable to the next person, so their opinion may leave you feeling like you should just grin and bear – and that’s not always the case.
When you feel like something is bothering you and no one believes you, ask yourself these questions to help support yourself when you don’t have the support of others:
1. What about this situation is bothering me?
2. Is there any way I can improve or change this situation?
3. If I can improve or change the situation, what are the steps I need to take to facilitate this improvement or change?
4. If I can’t change or improve it right now, what can I do to take care of my mental health while I go through this uncomfortable moment in my life? In most instances, changes can be made, but in the event it can’t, how can I make sure my mental health remains intact?
Write the answers to these questions down and make sure you commit to implementing the steps you chose to make a change.
In the movie, no one believed her, but she knew she wasn’t crazy so she eventually implemented a plan to save herself. We can choose to be our own heroes or our own villains.
Celebrate Your Victories
After she thought she was scot-free and able to live her best life, she celebrated. She celebrated by doing something for herself and by giving back by giving the girl money for college. I know sometimes we feel that we just need to move on and conquer the next goal in the line up, but it is important to pause and celebrate the victories no matter how big or small. Life should be a series of celebrations. Also, as you advance, give back. I have not mastered the art of self-help, but I have learned an abundance of information that I love sharing with everyone and until I can do more, that’s how I choose to “give back”.
Overall, there were some great themes in the movie that teach us that there are many invisible issues, vices, or nuances that can affect our overall well being. We have to equip ourselves with the knowledge and tools to identify and conquer those invisible things that stifle our growth. Right now my invisible man is facing my beliefs about my self worth. What are your invisible man issues? Let’s discuss below!